Well it's sure been awhile

I haven't wanted to post or anything because I've had like NO energy at all.

But exciting thing! Last week was the first week where I spoke Dutch the majority of the time everyday I spole VERY little English, I was very proud but also VERY exhausted. We also had out dutch test. Three hours long in Utrecht. The night before this test my sister and I were at my host cousins house. We were'nt planning on spending the night but OF COURSE we did :( My sister went to the movie with a boy and that was at around 9:00 or so..

The trams ride until 12:30 so me and ashley (host cousin) went to pick my siister up at like around 12:00 but of course.. she wasn't there! so we had to get on a tram to go home or else we werer gonna be stuck there without any way to get home, so we took the last tram home and then we finally get back to her house sterre calls and says shes at the train station.. alone.. UHG. so we had to friggin walk like 6 miles to pick her up in the cold! so by the time we get back and everything it's already like 4:30 ish and we're exhausted and starvving, so we make food and go to sleep around 5:00-5:30 ish..

See that would have been just peachy except that i had a 3 hour long test the next dayyyyyy :0 and we had to leave at 7:30 ni the morning. Do the math thats 2 hours of sleep... nice, eh? So anyways.. We leave at 7:30 stand in the cold at the randstad rail stop for like 10 minutes, then another 10 minutes by another randstad rail stop and then are finally home around 9:00 but i have to leave before 9:30 and i haven't showered or ANYTHING. So I get myself ready (looking nice sporting my american wear- sweatpants and my cheer sweatshirt and ugg boots) and go to this test.

Clearly as you can imagine im EXHAUSTED, Exhaustion+ADHD mind= shitty tests :( It was SO hard to pay attention, and it didn't help that the content in the test was SUPER boring.

I still got a 61/83 ;) a "VERY GOOD" for a score, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhha<33333

I was very proud of myself because I know I can speak I know I can understand most things so I'm happy with my score.


Skipping a week or so. Saturday we went out to a partayy!!! I went with Lara and her two friends, Madelon and Roos. :) IT was AMAZING! <3



As always I don't feel like typing.. Maybe tomorrow ;)

my tongue doesn't fit in my mouth..

;) I got a new piercing!

Sweet, huh? Everyone says (including the piercer) that tongue piercings are the LEAST painful piercing that you can get.. they lie. It was so painful and especially afterwards. You cannot eat any milk products, no alcohol, no hard drugs (yeah right hah) and you have to clean it afrer EVERYtime you eat. And it swells up HUUGE like humongous. But uhh, beauty is pain.. right?

Anyways I haven't updated in SO long. Sorry I haven't really been in the best mood for the past couple weeks. I had a little bit of homesickness but not so bad only for a day or two. It's more that I just feel like I'm missing out on things when I see pictures of my friends and stuff. But then I have to remember that if I was there I would probably be bored to death..

So I might be going to..
SURINAMEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
tonight we're having a meeting with my AFS liason so we'll see what he says! I'm crossing my fingers!!

Nothing real exciting has happened in the past month actually. It's been crappy weather so I haven't really been going out so much. It's FINALLY starting to get better and all the snow finally melted. Thank God!

Well I better go sweep the stairs before my host mom gets home!

(BTW, about a week or so until my halfway point!) good post coming then ;)

Conversation of a lifetime and God<3

Wow. I just had the conversation of a lifetime really. It's like one of those conversations you see in movies with the dramatic music. I'm NOT switching families. Me and Sterre are fine, and I think things are just about to become a lot.. lot different. 2010 is sure going to be a fascinating year.

I just had to update quick.


(I just want to stress this that I am in no way shape or form pushing my beliefs on others, this is completely what is going on in my life and my opinions.)

"If you are tired from carrying heavy burdens, come to Me and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
(Psalm 73:25-27)

I posted these because I honestly know that without God in my life for the past couple of months I don't think I would have been able to get through everything so well. I have a fear, a really strong fear that without God I really believe it could have taken over my life. Every time this fear comes to me I pray, and pray and pray and God takes it and I'm finally calmed and can finally breathe again. I don't want to come off as some "Jesus freak" or that I'm forcing my religion on people because I'm not. I'm saying for me God is who has pulled me through and kept me going when I was so terrified to do much of anything. I think maybe I'll be able to get over my fear with help and although it seems like the worst place to have developed such a fear and in a weird way I'm happy I did because it brought me so much closer to God and that's exactly what I need. I know things aren't going to be easy but I know I can be calmed just by praying or reading the Bible. <3

2010, rough beginning

Well 2010 didn't have the most smooth entrance in the world. Started with the most amazing firework display I've ever seen. You walk outside and every single direction you turn you see fireworks and fireworks and fireworks. It's a little on the difficult side to walk down your street because people are setting them off everywhere! when you turn a corner you have to be really careful of the people lighting off fireworks right there. It was.. amazing. Hours and hours of non stop fireworks so close to you. No water or anything for them to fall into just street :) Welcome to the netherlands!

So at midnight new years eve me, sterre, her older sister Sharon Rose, her younger sister Gabriella, her mommy, and her sisters friend Sabrina, all walked around Rotterdam looking at the fireworks.. amazing.

This is me and Gabriella :)




Me Gabriella and Sabrina! <3




So that night it was kinda weird with my host sister, as it has been for the past weeks and the next day everything crumbled down. We got into a huge fight once again over something completely stupid. I've never really been so mad before. I was laying there like shaking because I was SO mad. It was completely uncalled for.

The next day I went home and basically word vomited everything that had been going on with my and my host sister to my host mom and of course by the end of the conversation it got turned into how horrible of a kid I was...

host mom: "yeah well when you and sterre are both home we're going to have a talk and we also need to have a talk about your behavior the past couple of weeks.."

WTF?

honestly I'm not being stupid or whatever i haven't done anything. except for not cleaning my room when they told me to, but i don't think thats so huge, or am i wrong? i don't know, but tonight we're having our talk so we'll see.

The thing about being in this family is that honestly I am ALWAYS feeling so judged and theyre always pointing out things about me that aren't perfect and things that i do wrong and things i need to change about myself. Correct me if im wrong but i thought families were supposed to be there to pick you up and encourage you... this is the opposite.

So i don't know whats to come in the next months here in this house but we'll see. Oh! and they're leaving in the 3rd week of may to Suriname for 4/5 weeks :0 By the time they get back I'll have two maybe three weeks left here. Awesome right? So I have to go to a different family for that time.. hm.

Well yesterday I was talking to my momma on skype and we were talking about colleges which was SO exciting :D I found a really good college that has the study abroad program that I want! ARGENTINA<3 Which I've only been talking about forever, how I need to go there.. really, it's my calling ;)

OMG SO I WAS JUST SITTING HERE TYPING AND ALL THESE INTENSE CRAZY ALARMS START GONIG OFF AND IM THINKING OMDF BOMB ALARMS AHHHHHH MY HOST MOM JUST LEFT AND OMG WHAT DO I DO WE DONT HAVE A BASEMENT AHH!! SO I RUN DOWNSTARS AND CALL HER AND IM LIKE OMFG DO YOU HEAR THAT?! THOSE ALARMS!?! she starts laughing and goes "its the first monday of the month at noon they always test the sirens" ...oh...

And i ran upstars and found out we have no school today! YES, I LOVE LIFE.


Well talk about mood swings in the middle of a blog post :)

I have no fun news. Hopefully some will come ;)

My and Felix had a crazy windmill adventure<3

"we WISHHHH you a merry christmas"

SORRY my thoughts are SO scatter-brained tonight. I can't seem to get them out in an intelligent/organized manner but I tried my best! :) <3

So Christmas in the Netherlands was needless to say, not all that wonderful. I slept at Sterre's moms house (Cause shes not my host parents' actual daughter she just lives here) anyways, and we went to sleep at like 10:00 Christmas Eve and we set the alarm for 12:30 so we could get up at open presents then :) What little children we are hahah. So it was me, sterre, sterre's older sister sharon rose, sterres little sister gabrielle, and sterres older sisters friend sabrina who also lives there, so we all were sleeping in one room. Me and sterre in one bed (nothing out of the ordinary since she sleeps in my room like 5 days a week anyways) and Sharon rose and sabrina in one bed and the youngest got a bed of her own.. GO FIGURE! So anyways, we woke up at 12:30 as scheduled and went out to the little tree and gave our presents. Sterre was pretty much dead and all of a sudden she goes "we WISHHHHH you a merry christmas, we WISHHHH you a merry christmas!!!" and throwing her hands up while she did it and it was so loud and the highlight of my Christmas haha, it was the most hilarious thing in the world... at least to me at 12:30AM. so honestly to my surprise I got two things :D Sharon Rose got me this amazing Taylor Swift CD with a dvd with all this behind the scenes stuff... I was in love! <3 and Sabrina got me a 20Euro gift card to a music store! Perfect :) But then we went back to sleep after listening to a song or two off everyones CD that they got. (Gabrielle got the Justin Beiber CD and freaked out screaming and like dying haha, hilarious child right there, and Sterre got Chris Brown and Rhianne- coincidence.. huh?) Then we went back to sleep.

The next morning we had this HUGE dutch style breakfast with bread and crossiants and pannakoeken (: (sp?) it was so good, but then we had to go back home for actual Christmas day. So After we watched 2 episodes of Law and Order :) We went home and had gourmetta (the same thing we did for Thanksgiving) with Joy Vincent (host brother) and his girlfriend. It was nice but I was already so full from breakfast so I didn't really eat much.
Our dinner!


And that was Christmas... Day one. Exciting.. huh? Honestly though it was not, and I prefer Christmas in America SO much more. This is not exciting at all. Good thing I wasn't looking forward to it because I would have been really disappointed.

Christmas day two was also not so exciting but it was nice. We had another HUGE breakfast with pannakoeken and break and crossiants and nutella and peanut butter and jelly and eggs :)

This is my host dad, me, and my two host sisters. The one in front is Sterre and behind her is Rose Anne


We went BACK to Rotterdam to Sterres mom house and we watch like 3 more episodes of Law and Order :) With Sharon Rose and sterres mommy but I had (sorry boys) the worst cramps of my life. Apparently I had like NO color at all in my cheeks. I couldn't even like talk it was such horrible pain and I felt like I was gonna pass out, it was ridiculous. But Law and Order was good :D And then Ashley and her little sister (host cousins) came over and we ate together and watched I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, like one of my all time favorite movies. So it was very nice.

We slept over and the next morning me and sterre went to church and met my host mom and host sister and her friend Natalia there (who is such a super sweet girl!) and believe it or not.. I UNDERSTOOOOOOOD! :D Not all of church of course but I really did understand a good portion of it. I got the point. And it was.. amazing. :) I go to a Suriname church and it is intense. It's huge and on TV :D The people there are so passionate, when we sing its like you cannot hear ANYTHING else, the sound like surrounds you and overtakes you. Kinda overwhelming at first actually. But Its nice now :) The People will start jumping and everyone has their hands up and everyones dancing a little and singing so loud and you can tell they're just so passionate. I was in a pretty wonderful mood after church after being able to understand lots of sutff. :)

My dad was here at the beginning of the break and it was nice. He kept saying "Wow i cannot BELIEVE you can do this. etc. etc." Like when we would be waiting for trains he would be amazed at my patience and he couldn't believe how well I knew how to get around and what trains to get on and such. It made me realize that I really do know how to get around here now, it's just a part of life here. I don't have to worry about how to buy tickets or which trains to get on or which busses to take because now I just have figured it out by myself and its nice to not have to depend on other people so much.

I've realized how independent I've become. I always am going alone to Amsterdam and meeting people there. And to amsterdam I have to take the Randstad rail (Tram-like thing) then get off in Den Haag then take a train to Leiden sometimes then take another train to Amsterdam, and I just know how to do it. It's not an issue for me anymore. It's finally a nice feeling.

Also I've learned how to take care of myself. In America my mom had to check my make-up lines EVERYday but here theres no one here to do that so I just have to do it myself and I do. Also things like making Doctors appointments, or calling about issues with the bills, I just do it on my own, because I'm capable and there's really no one else who will do it.

I'm learning also to budget money. FOR SURE. When I first got here I spent an unbelievable amount of money because I had never realized it. I never realized how fast money can just be spent. You think "oh this bread is only 2 euros, and I get it everyday so it's ok" But that 2 euros a day REALLY adds up. The sports you do, the things you want to do, transportation, clothes, going out, all of this adds up so quickly and I had to realize that. I'm learning to be careful what I buy and always thinking to myself "do i NEED this?" I think this is a very important life skill. Veryyyy.

Something else I've learned which I knew in America but is also largely present here. I care TOO much about people close to me. And I SO MANY TIMES end up getting hurt because of it. I've already explained this enough in other posts I think. But it's so frustrating when I'll do so much for people and I'm always trying to make sure other people are okay and I'm completely fine with sacrificing my comfort for them. It's just not a big deal for me, but it becomes a big deal when I really need something, physically or just someone to talk to, and I see that the same people who I would do anything for they rarely give me the same respect and most of all love. I know I need to stop trying to save the world.. but maybe someday someone will want to save me too.


Life here isn't easy and sometimes I really miss the American ways, but I'm happy I'm doing this and for the most part I love it here.

On a side note I really hate school. It's a strong thing to say but I do unfortunately. But thankfully thats the only thing here that I can honestly say that I hate. ;)


OH: AND IM GETTING A NEW PIERCING NEXT WEDNESDAYYY! I'll post a picture! What do you think it'll be? ;)

Mine and Sterre's Snow Adventure :)


And A New Years Resolution :)

(P.S. im nasty cause i just got outta the shower ahha)
(P.S.S i wasn't talking to myself i was talking to someone on skype!)

<3 doei

VIDEO UPDATES :)

I haven’t updated this in like... forever. Like three weeks, and I’m really very sorry. SO much has happened and I never really wanted to write cause I have so much to say. Well I’ll start with gym class. :) so we get to choose between turnen (gymnastics) dance and boxing, so of course I chose turnen! So each week we did something different like mini trampolines and all this acrobatic stuff. So we had a show to the other two classes (dance and boxing) and all of us in total is somewhere are 5o/60 people. So at the end of our little performance my gym teacher had EVERYONE look at me and had our class go to one side of this long mat thing and I did a round off back handspring back handspring tuck and everyone was like ÖMFG that was crazy”and they all cheered and clapped :) it was so nice, really.

MR OIZO!! :D
So me Ashley and Sterre went to see Mr. Oizo at a club in Rotterdam! It was amazing actually. He’s a really amazing DJ and before he came on Sinterklaas and 2 Zwarte Piets were there, Sinterklaas was the DJ and the Zwarte Piets were just up there dancing and giving out pepernoten  So we danced and there’s this creepy nasty man who is in love with Sterre kept trying to talk to her and I would like lunge myself between them.. I'm such a good sister ;)

This is what I wore minus the boots haha they're my cousins (which is the girl next to me)


So I had all these other pics but my computer like did something stupid so they're not here anymore, but instead I'll post videos of my past couple adventures :)

These were dancers at Mr Oizo!


Sinterklaas and Zwarte Piet as DJ's At Mr Oizo! (sorry for the words ahha)


Mr Oizo!


My sister is hilarious, we have our days..



Our Snow Adventure :)


Why I love the Netherlands :) This is in Den Haag while we were shopping!

(better as in more cultural and cosy and nice)

Tomorrow is Christmas and I absolutely do not have any excitement which is kind of sad but.. eh. I'm not so homesick, I miss home but I just don't feel really much of anything.

Sorry this post took so long I kept procrastinating :)

"And it's true that I love you"

I love my sister




This is what we did while my host mom's birthday party was going on :D HAHAHA. We thought it was just hilarious, I don't know about all of you, but yeah.

Anyways, I haven't updated in like forever even though I actually had some time for once. Ms. Procrastination. So as I wrote earlier when I was with Sterre and while she got her piercing I almost passed out blahblahblah, so it happened again at the movies and again at my house while my friend was telling me a rather scary and sad story. So the doctor said it is just hyperventilation and I can't "have a stroke from it, and [my] heart won't stop" Reassuring right? NO. I'll live.

And now onto the interesting things. So December 5th is Sinterklaas! :D Which is like a holiday where little kids get presents basically and Sint and his Zwarte Piets come and give the presents and if a a kid isn't good Sint puts the kid in his bag thing and takes them to Spain.

So that's the jist of it. So kids REALLY believe in this and they don't believe in Santa Claus (unfortunate, i know) Ok on Saturday we had a Sinterklaas AFS party and a common thing to do for Sinterklaas is like a "gift exchange" KINDA. You have to buy like a 5 euro or less little present thing, which doesn't by an means have to be serious and then you have to make a "surprise" Like hide the present in something or put it in a box and put like jello in there so they have to search for it. So me and my host cousin Sheraldo made ROBBY THE ROBOT! (appppppplaaaauuuuseeeeeee) And we made the body out of a huge ugg box and put two cardboard things in there so when you shake it it sounds like theres stuff in there (trickytricky) and also made the legs outta boxes and we put the present in the head, but it was stuffed in there really well so when the box was shaken it felt like there was nothing in there. So the girl first opened the body and there was nothing and then the legs and then the antennes and then the head she took off and shook and she thought there was nothing in there so she put it aside and took off the arms and was SO confused and thought there was no present, ahah and it was in the head the whole time :) clever, eh?

I recieved the hat that Sint wears and my present was in there. It was quite nice. Before we did this gift exchange business 'Sint and Piet' came downstairs and Sint had everyone come sit next to him and he like talked about them. When I went over he talked about how I am 'really loud and talkative, and how I built houses in Mississippi and how I'm a cheerleader, and wanted to know my other hobbies. Interestingggggg.

So that night I went out with Felix and Nils :) It was fun but they were all tired so it was lame cause we went home at like 2:30. And for the first time ever nothing really extremely weird happened when I was in Alphen.

I just found out that a really beloved friends mom died this morning/last night. It's really hard because I'm here and I never got to really say goodbye but this is something I need to work on. I have this issue where when anyone dies or something bad happens in the news or someone is even just sitting alone it really breaks my heart. It feels like my heart has really been ripped out and I like cannot function. I have to learn it's ok to mourn and feel bad but that extreme-ness is pretty like unhealthy. I'm in the Netherlands but I loved her, she was amazing I have to remember the good times and leave it to rest. She's in God's hands now and not suffering anymore. It is so hard, I feel like I never had a chance to say goodbye. I never thought when I left America that would be the last time I saw her. It won't be easy, but this is life. Rest In Peace Jamie you will forever be loved and missed, Thank you for all the laughs and joy you brought us<3

Thanksgiving was this past Thursday! I had 7 friends over (all dutch) and we had gourmetta! There are two big skillets on the tabel and all different types of food, like chicken with different flavors, and beef, and vegetables, and pannakooken (: and all kinds of stuff and you get to make whatever you want and it's really a lot of fun. Although my host parents knew the number of people coming my host dad came into the foyer where ALL my friends were standing and starts this lecture about "how many people are here?! what do you expect me to do? I need to eat too!" blahblahblah. I was like you definitely get the award for most annoying person in the world. ECHT. But the rest of the night was really fun and I have really good/crazyy friends here :)


I'm not really in a writing mood today but I knew I needed to update a bit so there ya go ;)

Looking Forward to!
Mr. Oizo Party!: Friday December 4th with my sister<3

SINTERKLAAS!: December 5th

Sterre and Crystal day: December 12th

Dad Comes to Visit!: December 19th

Christmas! December 25th

Swimming in Scheveningen on New Years Day!: January 1st (6 AM)

ALL TIME LOW CONCERT!: February 9th!!! <3

These are my tops most exciting thigns that im looking forward to ;)

<3

My legs.. just died?

Hoi,

So the day before yesterday.. Tuesday, I woke up from a nap and I couldn't like walk, my legs were in excruciating pain and i had to go do ballet for CKV and it was horrible cause I couldn't even stand without like falling over. It was so weird, and the next day I woke up and again couldn't walk without being in the worst pain of my life, so I stayed in bed pretty much all day. So last night Tante Anne (host mom) gave my a leg massage and it was.. amazing :) and I woke up today and they feel better but still it hurts so bad to walk, but I'm in such a good mood I'm going to see New Moon even though getting to the movie theatre will be hell. So I had an epiphany yesterday while i was sitting here in pain, and I wrote in my journal so I'm going to explain.

I've realized that I've been stressing over and spending too much time trying to figure out who I am. I need to just live in the moment and not worry because that will come with time and come from all of my experiences. I need to remember that I'm in the netherlands, and to stop wishing I was back in America because I will NEVER have an opportunity and experience like this. Each day I sit there wishing I was in America or being homesick is another day that I'm wasting. I only have ONE year, actually under 8 months now and I can't waste another day. This time next year I'll be back in America, probably wishing I was back here. I'm going to have fun. No I don't need to get drunk every night, I'm going to go out with my friends and do crazy things and of course get weird looks from the bystanders because why live life un-noticed? I'm going to eat everything here that I can't in America just for that fact alone. I'm going to wear what I want because.. I'm foreign and why not? Someday I'm sure I'm gonna find true love and blahblahblah but for now, I'm still young and I just need to live, and make this experience the best it can be. I WILL leave an impression here. :)

Scary.. scary... scary.

Sorry I haven't updated in so long. I've been so exhausted lately and simply too lazy to do this. So we'll start with last week... Friday:

I went out with Felix and his really hot friend ;) and we danced all night and, it was just amazing. Until we got home. Poor Felix.. thats all I have to say.

The next day I went to Lara's house and went with her to her.. um now ex-boyfriends birthday party where my umm.. boy? was too. I had been thinking a lot that week about him, and about what I really wanted. I knew something felt off but I wasn't really sure what. But then it became the obvious. So Saturday night I talked to him at the beginning and then not so much throughout the night. I drank a little too much so of course later I felt like I still liked him, blah blah, so stupid me went over to him hanging on him and being all lovey dovey like I was with him at the beginning. STUPID STUPID STUPID. So then we left the party and went to that club where I met him the first time, and its for people 18 and older and me and Lara told him that I wouldn't be able to get in again.. no way. But no, he ASSURED us that I would be able to and low and behold I CANT get in. Surprise surprise. But Lara REALLY wanted to go in so she suggested that I go with Richards house to watch a movie for like an hour and she goes in and then we'd meet back there in like.. yeah an hour haa. So I REALLY didn't want to go with him because I of course was sobering up. But I went anyways because I knew she really wanted to go it. So the ride to his house was quiet and I just felt SO uncomfortable which made me actually quite mad. So we got to his house and earlier that night I had told him "ik wil je iets zeggen" which means- "i have something to tell you." so when we got to his house he knew we had to talk. So we were sitting on his sitting on his couch with the tv on and he was like getting close to me and stuff and i was jut being so distant and it just felt so NOT right. But it was sad cause he's so sweet so whatever. It took me like 45 minutes to get out what I wanted to say and finally I said it and he was simply taken back, and quite confused, but why shouldnt he be? So he was like.. well maybe we could get together some other time and talk about this more because we need more than 30 minutes to discuss this. so things were obviously awkward and my uncomfortableness again led to me being pissed off, which really wasnt fair to him but I really couldnt help it. so we had to ride back to where lara was and I wouldn't even like grip him at all which i ALWAYS do when im riding on the back of someones bike because its scary haha. i wouldnt even do that i just hung on to my seat. So when we got to Lara I knew he was kind of mad but whatever. And we got to laras moms car and he gave me a hug and walked me to the door and still wanted a kiss. I was such a bitch that night, :( i like gave him the crappiest kiss and said with my teeth literally clamped as tight as possible "BYE" Dickmove Crystal.. dickmove. :( In my defense, I couldn't help it.. really. so we went back to Lara's and talked and I've nveer had a more freezing night in my entire life. I slept on the air matress but it was so unbelieveably freezing. i had to wake lara up in the night because i was so cold. :0 it was SO bad.

ANYWAYS, the next day i came home. and it was not a so pleasent ride home. I was alone on the bus forf liek 40 minutes and then i was alone on the train for about 40 minutes again then on the randstad rail alone for about 30 minutes so i had ALL that time alone to just keep replaying in my head everything that happened the night before. Thats a bad bad thing.

So anyways. needless to say sunday was not the happiest day of my life hah.

MONDAY MONDAY MONDAY:
I had TURNEN in school :D which is like gymnastics for gym class. We used these trapeze like bar things. The first station was a trapeze thing like 1 and a half feet from the ground and two people went on at once and you had to pump your legs and swing on it and the girl who i went with, we went SOOO high. Seriously haha. It was SO much fun. and then the next group who went after us were the talelst boys is the class and when they swung on it it broke! :0 so scary, cause we were JUST on there! But it was so fun, there was another trapeze thing that you swung on and jumped off at the end. and ok there were rings. and i was doing a back flip on them and when i came down my gym teacher had these huge wide eye and was like "oh my God" and i was like "..what??" and he was like "normally your shoulder would be broken right now" and i was like "what?" and he was like "yeah your shoulders arent supposed to bend like that, normally peoples shoulders are broken that way." haha but i was fine and he was rather freaked out actually haha. i was like well im a cheerleader we have like magical bending powers haha. :D that was sweet. Oh and there was this girl in my group who looked JUST LIKE Catie Clear (LOVE YOU CATIE! <3) and it was so crazy. And this girl was also SOOOO nice. It was weird but cool haha. So that day i was inspired, so I called this turnen (gymnastics) place and they said I could come Wednesday to try it out.

Tuesday- OH! TUESDAY ;) so I had Biologie for the first 2 hours which just sucks. But after that it was up 9:55 and I got to go home and sleep until like 12 :) when I had to eat and then go back to school for CKV <3 it was awesome. So for CKV I'm doing dance for the next like month. So for the first two hours we watched videos about dance which were awesome. We watched like 4 M.J. Music videos :D it was amazing. and the next two hours we do dance. And this week it was hip hop dance. And our teacher was freaking awesome so even though I was not in the mood to dance it was ok cause she was sweet. and our dance was actually pretty cool too :) But I got paired with this emo kid- who was actually very nice by the way- and we had to do something for the intro before the dance started and we had no idea what to do. blah. And she was like well just do some cheerleading stuff and i was like ahh i dont know what to do . So we looked stupid but whatevs. So everyone had to go in their pairs and do the dance. So our intro was dumb and everyone knew i was nervous so we did the dance and when we were finished everyone cheered and clapped :) and before we started they were like "come on crystal!! you can do it! :D that was so nice. really. (: after the class ended I talked to the teacher about being a cheerleader and she was awesome she was like "omg thats so cool man, dont ever give that up" :) it was sweet.

Wednesday- ...TURNEN. So I was all excited. It started at 7:30 so me and Sterre left 30 minutes early JUST IN CASE we got lost. and of course.. we did, but for a freaking hour and 20 minutes. We wandered through this one neighborhood of Zoetermeer (my city) for like an hour thinking it was there. and asking all these people who all gave us wrong directions. So as we were biking in the freezing cold and dark I said "sterre..." and i usually have always called her "star" and she stopped with almsot a tear in her eyes and gets off her bike and gives me a big hug, shes like "omg that was so cute, youre almost dutch!" haha i just love her. So then we continued on with no idea where we were gonig. Sterre wanted to stop and go home, but knowing me i didn't care if the class was over we were STILL going to find it. So la la la- we STUMBLED across it. We were biking (relatively close to our house) and i turned my head and saw lights and then i was like that might be it! so we went over there and.. IT WAS. but it was 8:20 haha and the class ended at 8:30 but i got to practice with them for 10 minutes and they were using this tiny trampoline thing and doing things off it like straight jumps and front tucks (kinda). they were REALLY bad actually. I've never done that and I was better at it than the girls who've been doing it haha. :0 And then the put this vault right behind the trampoline and they were jumping on it and off and two girls could do a front handspring on it, which i was very impressed with haha. I didn't do that because i wasn't really up for it haha. And then it was like over, and one girl did a round off back handspring... with spot.. which i learned how to do when i was in 7th grade, but that's ok. I mean.. MAYBE more of them can do it? Who knows. Next week I can go again for free and I'll see exactly what they do cause I'll actually (hopefully) be there on time.

Friday- DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN, and here the interesting part comes. So me and Sterre had decided thatr we needed to have a night for us since we haven't in a while. So we went to Rotterdam and first went to see her mommy who is so cute :D and then we went to the.. PIERCING PLACE! :D so it waz a place like the door were abover ground but you walked down steps into the actual shop. So we went in and i got this pierced:


:D and then sterre got an implant piercing in her stomach right below her belly button. So I of course, as she did for me, was there to hold her hand and support her. So the lady used a pen like looking thing to implant the needle first so as she took the pen away the needle was still in her stomach and the lady had to use these tweezers to get it out and there was some blood and i looked at Sterre and her eyes were HUGE and she wasn't moving at all. And she said that I just slowly let go of her hand and said "um yeah.." and I couldn't walk or see or really hear to well what was going on around me and I felt someeone just grab me and walk with me and said you need to sit down, but my legs were already bent so i tried to straighten them and i couldnt see ANYTHING or walk and she helped me to a.. chair? and i heard a man say "shes passed out" and I couldnt feel anything going on around me. and i could slowly see the woman in front of me and i just held onto her arms for life. I thought, really thought, that I was going to die, really. And I just said to myself "i can't go i can't go i can't go" so i did my best to breathe as hard as i could and the lady got me water and a sugar pill thing and I slowly came back to reality. But honestly it was THE SCARIEST thing to ever happen to me in my whole life, and I can't understand why it happened either. I've never been quesey to stuff like that. It was just a really scary thing. Afterwards I couldn't even like talk, I was just in complete shock. and everything just keep replaying ALL night in my head. It was just horrible. So scary.

So today is Saturday, and I'm just going to RELAX, for like the first time on a saturday since ive been here. Sounds nice huh? <3

I'll update earlier next time haha.
Doei <3

LMFAO- SISTER <3

this is so old, from like the 3rd week i was here hahahaa.
and now i do go to all my classes :( lol we're usually not this stupid.. really.